The dating world is stressful. From “Netflix and chill,” to being “ghosted,” “breadcrumbed” or “kittenfished,” to knowing what to say and how to dress and where to go — it’s a lot of work for singletons.
And then, even after enduring all that stress, you still don’t know if you’ve picked a winner, or if you’re getting home later and contacting all local animal shelters in preparation for a mass cat adoption. Crazy cat lady life can’t be that bad.
There is hope of a sort, though. These 10 pets make a pretty good argument for just staying home on the couch and hanging with them. As far as I’m concerned, that’s the perfect date.
1. Long walks on the beach? Trying to convince a date that you’re really just interested in a walk on the beach can be a challenge. This dog however, loves those beach walks as much as you do.
2. Significant others can be a pain to take a selfie with, often involving awkward repositioning and unwanted advances. But this cat? He’ll take selfies with you all day long. And he’ll look quite handsome doing so.
3. When there’s another human involved, minimal standards of politeness dictate that you share the wine. Your pet lets you keep it all to yourself and not even feel bad doing so.
4. Once upon a time, dates showed up dressed to impress. Your pet will always want to impress you, but will always be impressed by you even when you’re in your jammies. Can’t beat that.
5. Remember that moment when you realized “Netflix and chill” actually meant something horrifyingly different? With your pet, you actually get to put on Netflix … and just chill. Amazing!
6. Another new dating term is “stashing” — basically keeping a significant other on the quiet by not introducing them to friends, family or social media. Although most pets don’t have a social media profile, they’re certainly not ashamed to be seen with you.
7. Catfishing and kittenfishing are also terms every dater needs to know. This happens when someone you’re talking with online presents themselves as someone else. Why they do this is a mystery, but your pet isn’t ever going to pretend to be something they’re not.
8. Dating is fraught with nerves and insecurity. One questionable look or action from your partner and you’re in immediate mental meltdown, wondering why you even exist. But in your pet’s eyes, you’re always the cat’s meow … even when you say something incredibly awkward.
9. When you’re dating, you often have to compromise and do things that the other person enjoys. When it’s you and your pets, though, you get to do whatever you want to do, and you know your pet will be happy to play along.
10. Finding the right person to spend your life with takes a lot of time and energy. But finding the right pet who will love you unconditionally for who you are takes no time at all. The minute you adopt a pet and bring them home, they’re yours.
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