It was anything but easy for Rob Lowe when his eldest son, Matthew, left for college.
The Unstable star recalled to PEOPLE the “brutal” experience of flying with Matthew — who turns 31 on Sept. 24 — and wife Sheryl to Duke University to help him move in for his freshman year of college.
“It brought up a lot of stuff,” he said during an interview for his August PEOPLE cover story. “And I thought, why is this affecting me so deeply? Because Sheryl was, I mean, not unaffected, but she wasn’t me.”
“I mean, I was like a puddle. I had to wear dark glasses on the plane because tears were streaming down my [face] the whole time,” Lowe, 60, admitted. “I couldn’t look at him sitting in his chair, in his little seat with a little book bag. I couldn’t do it… It’s triggering.”
“I was a wreck…I’ve realized it’s very, very, very common because people talk to me about it now all the time,” he added.
In fact, the 9-1-1: Lone Star actor — who is also father to the couple’s 28-year-old son John Owen — wrote about the experience of sending his first born away to school in his 2014 book, Love Life.
“It’s become something that year after year after year since I wrote it, gets passed around to parents who are sending their kids away for the first time… I love nothing more than when dads come up to me and they’re crying and they go, ‘Your thing about sending your kid to school, I read it and then I sent my kid to school and I cried in my car,’” he shared. “And I love that because it reminds me how alike everybody is.”
The Floor host added that Matthew leaving for college felt “like the end of this wonderful journey that I had as a father with Matthew and with Johnny” but he has since realized that it was only the start of a new chapter.
“Now, here we are however many years later, and you realize that was not the end,” he said. “They’re back and they’re not going anywhere.”
Lowe has taken pride in watching his boys grow up over the years. “Becoming a dad was the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” he shared. “It remains the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It’s also been the thing that I think I’ve been best at.”
That said, he knows he’s made his share of parenting mistakes along the way. “There’s no perfect way,” he noted. “We all f— our kids up in some way. I’ve learned that. But I feel very, very good that I was at a place in my life where I could devote all my energy to it.”
For Lowe, the bond with his sons extends into the professional sphere. He and John Owen co-created, co-executive, and co-write on the Netflix comedy, Unstable, which debuted its second season in August. The pair star as father-and-son Ellis and Jackson Dragon and their characters’ dynamic is inspired by their real-life interactions.
“I just have such pride in Johnny, in his ability to co-create a show like that, and the notion that my kid grew up to write a show and a character for me is [amazing],” he said, proudly noting his quick-study growth as an actor. “Johnny’s work in season 2 is next level.”
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Lowe is equally as professionally entwined with Matthew, who is a lawyer and businessman.
“Matthew and I have so many businesses that we’re doing together. He is currently working for Eldridge [Industries], and they own the Dodgers, and they own Chelsea [Football Club],” he said of his eldest son, who is a history buff like his dad, and shares Lowe’s love of skiing and fishing.
“I was on the phone with him four times today with different things,” he added. “So, I get the creative show-business with Johnny, and the business branding, investment opportunity with Matthew. I spend almost an equal amount of time with them professionally [and] personally, we’ve always been close.”